Welcome to the Children & Parents pages

The Lewisham Safeguarding Children Partnership (LSCP) is tasked with ensuring services are equipped to keep children and young people safe.

This section aims to provide you with useful information on where to seek help and support if you are worried about your own, or another child/young person's safety.  We have included some tips and information on things that young people have told us worries them, as well as useful website links and video clips. We want all children and young people in Lewisham to have happy, safe lives. This can start with looking after yourself first, so read on.

It’s Good To Talk

It may sound simple but if you are worried about anything the best thing you can do is talk to someone you trust. This could be

• Friend
• Parent/carer
• Teacher
• Youth worker
• Social worker

They may not always know exactly what to do but if they are an adult they can find out and help you. Just talking to someone can help you realise whether your worry is little and may just sort itself out in time or whether it is a big worry which means you need to do something about it as it is not going to get better until you do. Friends can be useful at helping you decide if your problem is big or small and they can help you tell an adult if you need to.

SOME WORRIES YOUNG PEOPLE MAY HAVE:

My parents argue and shout all the time

People don’t always get along. In the same way you fall out with your friends, sometimes parents can disagree over things. This sometimes means they argue and shout at each other which can be scary if you see or hear it. Most of the time adults are able to calm down and make friends with each other after an argument. Most adults sort out their differences by talking to each other. If the arguments happen regularly you could try to talk to your parents. If they realise that their arguments are upsetting you then it should help them to stop it. If you can’t talk to your parents or the arguments are violent then you need to talk to an adult you can trust. Click here for more information on Domestic Abuse.

Someone is hurting me

You can be hurt physically when someone injures your body in some way such as hitting you or you can be emotionally hurt when someone calls you names or says things that make you feel bad about yourself. Sometimes in families brothers and sisters can be quite mean to each other but they still shouldn’t physically hurt each other. If you are worried about this talk to your parent or carer. If someone else is hurting you then you need to tell someone you can trust.  If it’s other children hurting you then this could be bullying.

I’m scared when I walk home

It’s quite normal to be worried when walking around on your own especially at night. Lots of young people get concerned about walking past certain areas or groups of other young people. Click here for our top tips on walking home alone.

I’m scared on-line

If something happens on-line that worries you tell an adult immediately or click on the CEOP icon to report your concern

See our Online Safety page. If it is people you know making nasty comments tell someone you can trust and have a look at our section on bullying for help.

Advice for Parents when your Child is Unwell or Injured

If your child has any of the following: Becomes pale, mottled and feels abnormally cold to the touch Has pauses in their breathing (apnoeas), has an irregular breathing pattern or starts grunting Severe difficulty in breathing becoming agitated or unresponsive Is going blue round the lips Has a fit/seizure Becomes extremely distressed (crying inconsolably despite distraction), confused, very lethargic (difficult to wake) or unresponsive Develops a rash that does not disappear with pressure (the ‘Glass test’) Has testicular pain, especially in teenage boys

You need urgent help: Go to the nearest A&E department or phone 999

If your child has any of the following: Is finding it hard to breathe including drawing in of the muscles below their lower ribs, at their neck or between their ribs (recession) or head bobbing Seems dehydrated (dry mouth, sunken eyes, no tears, drowsy or passing less urine than usual) Is becoming drowsy (excessively sleepy) or irritable (unable to settle them with toys, TV, food or picking up) - especially if they remain drowsy or irritable despite their fever coming down Has extreme shivering or complains of muscle pain Babies under 3 months of age with a temperature above 38°C / 100.4°F Infants 3-6 months of age with a temperature above 39°C / 102.2°F For all infants and children with a fever above 38°C for more than 5 days. Is getting worse or if you are worried Has persistent vomiting and/or persistent severe abdominal pain Has blood in their poo or wee Any limb injury causing reduced movement, persistent pain or head injury causing persistent crying or drowsiness

You need to contact a doctor or nurse today. Please ring your GP surgery or call NHS 111 - dial 111 The NHS is working for you. However, we recognise during the current coronavirus crisis at peak times, access to a health care professional may be delayed. If symptoms persist for 4 hours or more and you have not been able to speak to either a GP or 111, then take your child to the nearest A&E

If none of the above features are present You can continue to provide your child care at home. Information is also available on NHS Choices Additional advice is available to families for coping with crying of well babies Additional advice is available for children with complex health needs and disabilities.

Self care Continue providing your child’s care at home. If you are still concerned about your child, call NHS 111 - dial 111

Bullying

Bullying can happen to anyone at any age and can take place at school, online, in the street or even at home. Bullying is when someone or a group of people do things that hurt you and make you feel scared or bad about yourself. This can include:

• hitting
• pushing
• name calling
• teasing
• talking about you
• taking money and possessions

If this happens to you then you need to tell an adult so they can help you. Bullies like to be kept secret so they can get away with their bad behaviour so tell someone and then they can’t get away with it. By reporting it you could stop them doing it to someone else.

Cyber or On-Line Bullying

This is when someone or a group upset or humiliate you using the internet, on-line games, email, apps, social media, or text. It is the same as any other form of bullying but you don’t always know who is doing it.

• If you get any horrible comments or messages take a screen shot immediately and show it to an adult. It can be hard but the best thing to do is not respond to any nasty comments and if they keep happening take action
• You can report online bullies by pressing the CEOP button that is on most websites
• Immediately block anyone who bullies you online. Even if you know the person, if they start being unkind to you then block them and report them to the website
• Always make sure your profile is safe and you have used the privacy settings so only people you know can see your posts

ChildLine has more information on how to deal with bullying on different social media sites.  

Visit our Online Safety page for more information to stay safe online and bullying.

No one has the right to hurt you or make you feel bad and you don’t have to put up with it. If you are being bullied tell someone you trust NOW!

 

Child Protection Conferences

Lewisham's Children's Social Care Pledge to Service Users

• We will always put your children's safety and welfare first.
• We will not get involved in your family's lives any more than we need to.
• We will be open, honest and fair in our work with you and your family.
• We will always be polite and treat you with respect.
• We will work closely with other agencies to give you better support.
• We will write to you about major decisions.

What is a Child Projection Conference?

There is nothing more important than the safety and well-being of our children. A Child Protection Conference is a meeting between families and professionals which is held when there is concern about the safety of a child within a family.

The new Child Protection Conference helps your family and caregivers to work with Lewisham’s Children’s Social Care and other services to keep your child safe.

Lewisham is using a new way of working with your family and your children. We have introduced a more family friendly approach to Child Protection Conferences to ensure the best possible outcomes for your children and your family.

The new Child protection Conference meeting known as Strengthening Families Child Protection Conference meetings will assess risk by looking at strengths in your family; looking at worries about your family; and make decisions about child safety.

The purpose of a Conference is to:

• Share information about your child’s health, safety and wellbeing.
• Assess whether your child is suffering, or likely to suffer significant harm.
• Identify the strengths within your family.
• Identify any assistance needed by your family and professionals/agencies who might be able to provide this.
• Identify changes needed (if any) in order to ensure the safety of your child, which will be written down and given to you.
• Decide if your child needs to be subject to a Child Protection Plan.

A Child Protection Conference does not make decisions about legal or court action, or about where children should live.

As a parent, you are invited to attend the Conference and we would encourage you to take an active part. You may also bring someone with you as a supporter if you would like. This can be another family member, a friend, or some other person of your choice.

How can you prepare?

During the conference you will be given the chance to comment about what others are saying and to give your own information and views. You will also be asked what you think should happen in the future, including any help you feel is necessary.

Many families who have attended Conferences in the past tell us they were very nervous and didn’t say as much as they would like to. To help overcome this, it is sometimes helpful to do some preparation in advance.

We do not think it is fair that only professionals have the opportunity to provide a written report of what they want to say and parents do not get the same chance. You may write down the things you want the conference to know using the form provided. If you need help with this, please talk to the social worker.

Who else will be at the Conference?

Anyone who is able to support your child and your family can attend. This will include services and professionals who work with your child and your family. Everyone who attends the new conferences will have a chance to speak about:

• what is working well and;
• what is worrying them and;
• be involved in decisions about who might support your child who has been harmed, or is believed to be at risk of harm.

The Conference will be chaired by an Independent Chairperson. There will also be someone to take notes at the meeting.

A number of professionals will also be invited to the meeting, such as:

• Social Workers
• Health Visitors
• Doctors
• Teachers
• Attendance & Welfare Officers
• Probation Officers
• Police.
• Professionals who have been involved with your family will be invited, but there may also be some individuals and agencies present, who you may not have met before. These individuals are invited because their expertise is required or because they may be able to assist you, your child, and your family.

Talking to children

It is important your child has an opportunity to talk about what they are worried about; what makes them happy; and what they would like to see happen in their family to keep them safe.

What happens at an Initial Conference?

The Independent Chairperson will meet with you just before the conference to welcome you, to explain how the Conference will run, and to talk about the best way for you to contribute to the discussion. The Chairperson will also ask you to tell us about the most significant people in your family and particular friends who help you to look after your children.

At the start of the Conference all the participants will introduce themselves, and the Chair will ask professionals to summarise the most important parts of their reports. You will be invited to contribute to this discussion. A plan will be developed with you and the professionals, after which a decision will be made about whether the risks to your child are significant enough that a Child Protection Plan is needed.

A Child Protection Plan is a list of actions with details of who is to carry out these actions and over what timescale.

You should come out of the Conference clear about what (if anything) needs to change. More detailed plans are usually made at a later meeting between you and the relevant professionals. This meeting is called the Core Group and usually happens immediately after the initial conference and as often as is needed afterwards.

It may mean that we do not make a Child Protection Plan for your child, but we will still try to help and support you, but the discussion will have identified assistance which may benefit your child, you and your family.

What can you expect from Children's Social Care?

They will work in partnership with you and your family. As a parent/carer, you should expect to:

• be listened to.
• be treated with respect.
• be kept informed and involved in decisions.
• get all the assistance and help that has been offered to you within the agreed time scales.
• receive a reliable service, with professionals doing what they say they will do.
• be absolutely clear about what we expect from you.
• receive copies of all reports 2 days before an initial Conference and 5 days before a Review Conference.
• get a copy of the Conference minutes within 20 working days of the Conference.

If you don’t feel we are meeting these standards, you should let us know.

What happens after the Conference?

After the Conference you will be sent a copy of the record of the conference.

If a Child Protection Plan is made, you will also be asked to attend regular meetings called ‘Core Groups’. At these meetings, you will look at the plan and discuss what progress has been made.

A Review Conference will be held after 3 months and then at 6 monthly intervals for as long as your child is subject of a Child Protection Plan.

My Report for the Conference

We recognise that it is not easy to remember everything you want to say. You can put your views in writing if you think that this will help. You do not have to do if you do not want to.  The following questions may be helpful to you when thinking about what you do want to say.

1. What is going well in the care of my children?
2. What am I worried about ?
3. This is what I think needs to change so that my children are safe and happy.
4. This is what would be helpful to my family to make those changes.

Keeping Information Safe

The information you are provided and held by agencies is highly confidential.  The content of the information must not be copied or disclosed to any person other than the individual it is intended for, unless the information must be shared for the purpose it was given.

When in receipt of the information, please ensure it is protected and maintained securely.

When you are finished with the information please safely destroy it by cross cut shredding or secure disposal.  Under no circumstances must the information be binned un-securely.

If you cannot dispose of the information in a secure manner please return the information to:-

Lewisham Children's Social Care Department, 1st Floor, Laurence House, 1 Catford Road, London SE26 4RU

Information must not be kept for longer than needed.  If you have received it in error please contact Corporate Information on 020 8314 9928 or return it to the sender.

If you do not adhere to the above disclaimer you could be in breach of the Data Protection Act 1998 and therefore could face legal proceedings.

You can download and print the leaflet What is a Child Protection Conference?

Useful Link: London Child Protection Procedures

Domestic & Relationship Abuse

Young People & Relationship Abuse

Most relationships are healthy and safe, and our parents or carers, extended family, boyfriends, girlfriends and friends want the best for us and treat us well. However sometimes this isn’t the case.

Relationship (domestic) abuse is when someone hurts, threatens or makes you feel scared or uncomfortable. It isn’t just physical violence but any type of controlling, bullying, threatening or violent behaviour between people in a relationship and includes emotional, physical, sexual, financial or psychological abuse.

Abuse is not normal and never ok regardless of how old you are. If you are in a relationship with someone, you should feel loved, safe, respected and free to be yourself. There are different forms of abuse and for more information and to find out where to get help visit: Disrespect NoBody Campaign website 

Remember it’s not your fault and it is important to talk about it with someone you trust.

Has anyone given you money, drugs, alcohol or gifts and somewhere to stay and then forced you to…

• have sex with them?
• do something sexual to them?
• be touched inappropriately, in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable?
• look at sexual images?
• watch them to something sexual?

Go to our page on Multi-Agency Child Exploitation (MACE) Strategy & Resources to find out more

The Domestic Violence, Crime and Victims Act 2004 defines domestic violence as ‘any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between adults who are, or have been intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexual orientation.’

Domestic abuse is any incident of controlling, coercive, threatening behaviour, violence or abuse:

• between people aged over 16
• who are, or have been, intimate partners or family members

and can involve

• Physical: being hit
• Sexual: rape, sexual assault, degrading treatment
• Financial: having money withheld or being forbidden from getting a job
• Social: not being allowed to see friends and family or go out
• Psychological: constantly telling someone they are worthless and so reducing their self-esteem and confidence
• Emotional: telling a person their children will be taken from them if they leave or that no one else will love them

It can happen to anyone, regardless of age, social background, gender, religion, sexuality or ethnicity, and can begin at any stage of the relationship.

Domestic abuse can also include forced marriage and so-called “honour crimes”.

It’s abuse if your partner or a family member:

• puts you down, or attempts to undermine your self-esteem
• controls you, for example by stopping you seeing your friends and family
• is jealous and possessive, such as being suspicious of your friendships and conversations
• frightens you

Domestic abuse and safeguarding children

Children who live in families where there is domestic abuse can suffer serious long-term emotional and psychological effects. Even if they are not physically harmed or do not witness acts of violence, they can pick up on the tensions and harmful interactions between adults.

Children will learn their behaviour from examples set by other people around them and exposure to domestic abuse teaches children negative things about people and their relationships. For instance:

• It teaches them that violence is acceptable and that they can use it
• They learn how to keep secrets
• They learn to mistrust those close to them

Being exposed to domestic violence can have a long-lasting effect on children which could affect their ability to form relationships in the future, including:

• Blaming themselves for the violence
• Feeling frightened
• Becoming withdrawn
• Bedwetting
• Running away
• Aggressiveness
• Behavioural difficulties
• Problems with school
• Poor concentration
• Emotional turmoil
• Lack of respect
• Loss of self-confidence

Who to contact

POLICE: 101 or in an emergency 999

Services Available to Lewisham Residents

Refuge, The Athena Service

The Athena service, run by Refuge provides confidential, non-judgmental support to those living in the London Borough of Lewisham who are experiencing gender-based violence. It opened its doors in April 2015 and provides outreach programmes, independent advocacy, group support, refuge accommodation and a specialist service for young women.

It provides the following services, all under one roof:

• One-to-one confidential, non-judgmental, independent support
• A specialist independent gender-based violence advocacy (IGVA) team to support clients at risk of serious harm
• A specialist service for 13-19 year-old girls
• Group support
• A peer support scheme to help break isolation; build social networks and provide support clients regain control of their lives
• Volunteering opportunities

Telephone: Athena Service on 0800 112 4052

Email: lewishamvawg@refuge.org.uk

Website: Refuge Athena One Stop Shop Services  

African Advocacy Foundation

A community-led organisation working to promote better access to health, education and other opportunities for disadvantaged communities in the UK, Europe and parts of Africa.

​​African Advocacy provide practical support, policy work, advocacy, information, guidance and training to professionals and community members alike. African advocacy work to empower individuals and families experiencing multiple disadvantages and barriers including ill health, poverty, deprivation, violence, isolation and those relating to language, culture, faith and other social issues.

Location:

CATFORD (MAIN) OFFICES:

76 Elmer Road, Catford, London SE6 2ER

Telephone:

0208 698 4473

Website: https://www.africadvocacy.org/

BelEve UK

The purpose is to equip girls and young women with the right support, skills and confidence to make informed choices about their future; improve their educational, social and economic outcomes whilst taking control of their lives.

Location:
The Albany, Deptford, SE8 4AQ

Telephone:

0203 372 5779

Website: https://beleveuk.org/

Latin American Women’s Rights Service (LAWRS)

LAWRS has a zero tolerance policy of any form of Violence against Women and Girls (VAWG). Our team offers advice, advocacy and practical support to Latin American women who are experiencing or have experienced Domestic Violence, Harmful practices or any other form of violence.

Location:

Tindlemanor, 52-54 Featherstone Street.
London, EC1Y 8RT

Telephone:

 020 7336 0888, 084 4264 0682

Website: http://www.lawrs.org.uk/

IKWRO – Women’s Rights Organisation

IKWRO are committed to providing non-judgmental support to women who speak Kurdish, Arabic, Turkish, Farsi, Dari, Pashtu and English.

Location:

IKWRO – Women’s Rights Organisation
PO Box 75229
LONDON
E15 9FX

Telephone:

0207 920 6460

Website: http://ikwro.org.uk/

Women and Girls Network (WGN)

WGN is a free, women-only service providing a holistic response to women and girls who have experienced, or are at risk of, gendered violence.

Telephone:

0808 801 0660

Website: http://www.wgn.org.uk/

WE Women (Women Empowering Women)

We Women is a collaboration of women which has been delivering community support to women since March 2017. In August 2018, we women became a constituted community group.

We Women are entirely volunteer run, and our aims are to:

• Empower women to be more self-sufficient
• Improve women’s health & well-being
• Address the material impacts of poverty within the local community

Location:

Pepys Resource Centre Old Library Deptford Strand London
London
Greater London
SE8 3BA
United Kingdom

Telephone:

020 8691 3146

Website: https://www.lewishamlocal.com/places/united-kingdom/greater-london/london/lewisham-groups/we-women-women-empowering-women/

Early Years Alliance - Lewisham Children's and Family Centres

The Alliance is working together with Clyde Nursery School, Beecroft Garden School and Kelvin Grove/Eliot Bank and Downderry Children’s Centres to deliver a clear seamless borough wide children’s centre offer for families in the London Borough of Lewisham, working alongside health visiting, midwifery, schools and public health services.

Lewisham Children and Family Centres offer families access to a range of health, education, play, parenting, adult education, employment support and family support services right across the borough.

Website: https://www.lewishamcfc.org.uk/

National Stalking Helpline – Suzy Lamplugh Trust

The National Stalking Helpline is run by Suzy Lamplugh Trust. Their mission is to reduce the risk of violence and aggression through campaigning, education and support.

Telephone: 0808 802 0300

Website: https://www.suzylamplugh.org/

METRO

METRO is a leading equality and diversity charity providing health, community and youth services across London and the south-east, with some national and international projects. METRO promotes health, wellbeing and equality through youth services, mental health services and sexual health and HIV services and works with anyone experiencing issues related to gender, sexuality, diversity or identity.

Location: 141 GREENWICH HIGH ROAD, GREENWICH, SE10 8JA

Telephone: 020 8305 5000

Website: https://metrocharity.org.uk/

RASASC - Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Centre Rape Crisis South London

RASAC believe too many women have had to be silent for too long about the violence perpetrated against them.

They understand that it can be difficult to speak up, hard to find the words or to believe that anyone will listen.

RASAC will listen. They believe. They will stand up alongside you. You do not have to do this alone.

Telephone: 0808 802 9999

Postal Address:
PO BOX 383, Croydon, CR9 2AW

Website: http://www.rasasc.org.uk/contact/

Stonewall

Information and campaigning for LGBT rights. Got a question? A problem? Need support? Stone wall are here to help with any issues affecting LGBT people or their families. Whatever your situation, you’re not on your own. Stonewall will do what they can to help or point you in the right direction to someone who can.

Telephone: 0800 0502020

Write to Stonewall: Stonewall 192 St. John Street London EC1V 4JY

Website: https://www.stonewall.org.uk/help-advice/contact-stonewalls-information-service

Respect

Men and women working together to end domestic violence

Telephone: 0808 802 4040

Address: The Green House

244-254 Cambridge Heath Road

London

E2 9DA

Website: http://respect.uk.net/

The Deaf Health Charity – Sign Health

www.signhealth.org.uk/our-projects/deafhope-projects/

Text: 07970350366

Rights of women

www.rightsofwomen.org.uk

Respect Helpline for men

0808 8010327

www.respectphoneline.org.uk/help-for-domestic-abuse-victims  

Women's Aid live chat

This is an online chatting service which is ideal for victims who are self-isolating and do not want to be heard.

www.chat.womensaid.org.uk  

www.womensaid.org.uk

0117 944 44 11

NSPCC Helpline - 0800 028 3550 or fgmhelp@nspcc.org.uk

GALOP National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline

0800 999 5428

www.galop.org.uk/domesticabuse

Supporting documents

• Domestic Violence Information Sheet
• Home Office Guidance: Domestic Violence and Abuse

 

Getting Help Early

Welcome to the LSCP parent and carer pages. Here you will find key information about some of the safeguarding challenges facing children, young people and their parents today, along with links to support, advice and guidance on keeping them safe.

Getting help early

Children of any age can experience problems at times, and parents or carers can’t always meet their needs by themselves. When children do require some extra support it’s always best to put help in place before things worse.

Throughout your child’s life there are people around you can go to get advice, guidance and support, for example:

• Midwives
• Health Visitors, GPs
• Children’s Centres, nurseries
• Schools
• Other workers you might be in contact with such as Youth Workers, PSCOs or Housing Officers

Go to the Family Information Service website for more information

If you are worried about the safety of a child go to the  worried about a child page

There are some national organisations that offer support for parents around specific safeguarding issues. You will find links to these in the relevant pages.

Supporting Children and Young People with Special Educational Needs and Disabilities, Age 0-25

The Local Offer website is a collaboration between parents and carers of disabled children, young people and Lewisham Council to help you find what is available in the area for those with Special Education Needs or Disabilities (ages 0-25) and how to access a variety of services.  These range from health, social care and education to respite, leisure facilities, support groups and the voluntary sector.

Private Fostering

Private fostering involves an arrangement made without the involvement of the local authority between the carer and the child’s parent/s or person with parental responsibility, regardless of whether money is exchanged and that arrangement is intended to last 28 days or more (the child is not a Looked After Child). 

Keeping Babies Safe

This page provides parents and care givers with information, advice and access to further support in relation to water and bath safety, coping with a crying baby and ensuring your baby is safe whilst sleeping. 

If you have any concerns about your baby or you're worried about your mental health or emotional wellbeing please contact your GP or Health Visitor.  If you or your baby are in immediate danger or there is a risk to either of your health please phone 999.  

For information and advice click on the subject title.  To change the language, click on the Select Language at the top of the website.

To find parent/carer support groups and activities in your area visit the Lewisham Council Support for Parents & Carers webpage

Mindful Mums provide award-winning, free wellbeing groups that help women look after their mental and emotional wellbeing during pregnancy and their baby’s first year. Since it started in 2016, Mindful Mums has supported over a thousand women in Bromley, Lewisham and Greenwich.

Being Dad groups are for expectant/new dads or men with parenting responsibility for babies and young children up to two years old.

Water & Bath Safety +

Coping with Crying +

Safer Sleep +

Your Lewisham Health Visiting Service +

Useful Links +

Resources for parents who may need support or equipment for their baby +

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, and Questioning Support

METRO Charity is a leading equality and diversity charity, providing health, community, and youth services across London and the South East, with national and International projects.  METRO Youth works with anyone experiencing issues around sexuality, gender, equality, diversity, and identity across our five domains:

1. Sexual & Reproductive Health
2. Community
3. Mental Health & Wellbeing
4. Youth
5. HIV

METRO Youth offer a free and confidential youth group and service for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, and questioning (LGBTQ) young people.

Zest - 16 years and under - Friday evenings, 4:30pm to 6:30pm, Greenwich

Zest is a free and confidential youth group for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 16 in South East London. The group meets every Friday after school. Zest is a friendly & safe space to meet other LGBTQ young people, get support and enjoy fun activities, trips out and workshops about things that interest you.

Click-through link here: https://metrocharity.org.uk/youth/metro-zest

Zest Flyer

Live - 16 - 25 years - Wednesday evenings, 6:30pm to 8:30pm, New Cross

LiVE is a free and confidential youth group and service for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, & questioning (LGBTQ) young people in Lewisham aged 16-25. It’s a friendly and safe place to meet other young LGBTQ people. We run fun activities, trips out and workshops about things that interest you. LiVE is a free and confidential place to get support from dedicated and experienced youth workers.

We offer access to a range of other free services. Click-through link here: https://metrocharity.org.uk/youth/metro-live

Live Flyer

Get in Touch

Telephone:   020 8305 5004

Email:           youth@metrocharity.org.uk

Facebook:    METRO Charity

Website:      https://www.metrocentreonline.org/ 

Online Safety

The internet is a great way for children and young people to connect with others and learn new things. It’s important that they learn how to do this safely.  This video highlights a social experiment “Follow me” by Barnardos.  We want to help you keep your child safe online just like you do in the real world.

https://www.barnardos.org.uk/what_we_do/advertising_campaigns/followme.htm

The internet is a great way to connect with others and learn new things. It’s important you know how to stay safe and keep others safe online.
Top Tips for Staying Safe Online for Children & Young People

 Be careful what photos and video’s you post online or share with a “boyfriend or girlfriend”.  It can be difficult to control who can see them and how they will be shared, you may not want it to go viral!  Don’t post anything you wouldn’t want your teachers or parents to see.  Taking, making, sharing and possessing indecent images and pseudo-photographs of people under 18 is illegal and you could be prosecuted.  A pseudo-photo is an image made by graphics or art which appears to be a photo. This can include, photo’s, video’s, tracings, and anything that can be converted into a photo.  You can read the full “Indecent Images of children: guidance for young people” here 

Be careful who you talk to.  Someone might not be who they say they are.  Friends you make on-line are still strangers, even if you’ve been talking to them for a long time.  You can say no and/or log out of your computer.  Don’t meet up with friends you make online unless you’ve talked it through with an adult you trust first and they can help you stay safe. 

Don’t be afraid to block someone.  You don’t have to put up with bullying or seeing anything that you find upsetting.  Report it to the site administrator and talk to an adult you trust.  Remember you can choose to close the App or Website at any time.

Always put the privacy settings on and don’t share personal information, including details like your date of birth, home address, email address, phone number, passwords or any other information that may be useful to someone who wants to bully or hurt you.

Think about how you’re feeling before you go online, could someone be offended or upset by what you’re saying or posting?  You may say something you regret later on and damage your reputation.   Your digital footprint will last forever, even if you have deleted something from your device or profile it may still be visible to other people on other networks.  It has been known for young people to find their college and / or job applications be affected by something they posted online.

Unfortunately, there are people who go online to bully others or get them to do things that could be illegal or harmful to you or others.  If you are bullied or are worried about anything you see, hear, or are asked to do something either online or in the real world, tell a parent or another trusted adult, like your teacher, or contact Junior Crimestoppers @ www.fearless.org .  Preserve evidence by saving or taking a screen shot of the message or material and report it to the site administrator – all sites have a no blame culture with children and young people.  You do not have to do anything you don’t want to or anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. 

If you see something on a social network site, a website, or someone tries to draw you into extremist or radicalised views, you can get help by contacting the Prevent Team, prevent@lewisham.gov.uk.

We recommend you keep your knowledge and skills of staying safe in a digital world up-to-date by regularly looking at the ThinkUKnow website, however there are some other good sites you may also like to look at:-

• ThinkUKnow
• UK Safer Internet Centre
• Internet Matters
• The Mix; offers a variety of advice and information for under 25's.
• Fearless (Junior Crimestoppers)
• http://www.akt.org.uk/ - LGBT
• Stone Wall- LGBT

Top Tips for Parents and Carers of Children & Young People in The Digital World

To help your child to enjoy the experience of accessing the digital world we recommend you talk to your child about keeping themselves safe and what to do if they see or hear something that they find upsetting, like taking a screen shot of the evidence and reporting concerns to the site administrator, or the police via www.ceop.police.uk .  Remind them they can close the App or website at any time, and most importantly to talk to you if they are worried or upset.

Web based information and social networking sites can increase the risk of a child or young person being groomed for sexual exploitation, criminal activity, general exploitation, or violent extremism.   It is common for the child or young person to not recognise they are being exploited or groomed.  The best way to make sure they stay safe is to have regular, open conversations with your child.  You can also look through the history browser to see what websites have been accessed.  If you do become worried that your child is being radicalised you can contact the Prevent Team, on 020 8314 6000 or email prevent@lewisham.gov.uk.  You can also report any other exploitation or abuse that takes place online the Multi-Agency Safeguarding Hub on 020 8314 6660 or email mashagency@lewisham.gov.uk.

Sometimes children and young people don’t think about the images they post online or share with their “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”.  In response to this, the government have issued guidance for children and young people on the sharing of indecent images, this can be read here:

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/indecent-images-of-children-guidance-for-young-people/indecent-images-of-children-guidance-for-young-people

Online gaming via consoles, phones, and apps can provide a child access to talking to strangers and building “virtual friendships”.  It is important your child understands it can be dangerous to share personal information as the person may not be who they say they are.  Have a conversation with your child about this, particularly in case your child considers meeting up with someone they have spoken to online.  If you do agree to this, we recommend you meet with them too, as they may not be who they say they are and it could lead to your child being harmed.

When considering buying a game or app for your child, think about the recommended age restriction and research the game on YouTube first.  You may be surprised at the level of violence or content of some games and it may not be appropriate for your child’s age.

We recommend you keep your knowledge and skills of staying safe in a digital world up-to-date and by regularly by looking at the ThinkUKnow website: https://www.thinkuknow.co.uk/ and talking to your child about their experiences.

NSPCC On-line Safety has advice and tools to help keep your child safe online.

Think You Know provides advice on online parenting.  There is also further information at Think You Know training.

Child Exploitation & Online Protection (CEOP)

CEOP is there to support young people, parents and carers while surfing online, and offers help and advice on topics such as:

• cyberbullying
• hacking
• harmful content

It also enables people to immediately report anything online which they find concerning, such as harmful or inappropriate content, or possible grooming behaviour. For more information, or to report concerns, simply click on the CEOP Icon

Private Fostering

Private fostering is when a child or young person aged under 16 (or under 18 if they are disabled) is cared for and provided with accommodation for 28 days or more by an adult who is not a close relative.

A close relative is an aunt, uncle, step parent, grandparent or sibling, but not a cousin, great aunt/uncle or family friend.

A private fostering arrangement is normally organised between the parent and carer. There are many private fostering situations. These may involve children or young people:

• who are sent to this country for education or health care by their birth parents from overseas
• whose parents work or study long or antisocial hours
• who are living with a friend’s family as a result of parental separation, divorce or arguments at home
• who are living with their partner’s family.

What do I have to do if I am privately fostering or my child is privately fostered?

Any parent, private foster carer, or anyone else involved in making a private fostering arrangement, must notify the council for the area in which the child will be or is placed.

You have a responsibility to ensure that your child is in a suitable and safe private fostering arrangement that provides for your child’s cultural, religious, linguistic and other needs.

If you think that your child will be in this placement for 28 days or longer, you have a legal duty to tell the Council at least six weeks before the arrangement is due to start. If the arrangement is due to start within six weeks or is already in place, then you must tell the MASH team at the Council immediately.

The law states that you must tell us of a private fostering arrangement, this information will help us ensure that your child is well looked after and does not come to any harm.

A private fostering arrangement does not mean that you are giving up your rights to your child. This is a temporary arrangement and you still have parental responsibility and will continue to be involved in all decisions about your child’s life. It is very important that you stay in contact with your child as much as possible. By staying in contact, you will know of any changes in the circumstances of the carer (for example if they go on holiday or move house).

What if I already privately foster but did not know that it I had to tell the Council?

You should contact us and explain the situation. We will be pleased to take your details and explain the first stage of the assessment process. Please remember that if you are involved in a private fostering arrangement and you don’t notify us you are committing an offence, and could risk a fine.

If you are involved, or likely to be involved in a private fostering arrangement and have not already told, or if you are in any doubt as to whether the regulations might apply to you, you should seek advice from the Lewisham MASH team.

Why does the Council need to get involved?

We have a legal duty to ensure that your child is being looked after safely and that the arrangement is suitable for your child. We will make regular visits to your child and his or her private foster carer, and we can provide help and advice where necessary.

If the private foster carer is not giving you enough information or you are unhappy about the standard of care your child is receiving, then you should contact us as soon as possible. Together we will do our best to ensure that your child is safe and well looked after.

Contact

Phone Lewisham MASH team on telephone number 020 8314 9181 or 020 8314 6660 or by email mashagency@lewisham.gov.uk

Private fostering referral and assessment team telephone number 020 8314 6523

Documents/leaflets

Private Fostering Fact Sheet

Is Someone Else Looking After Your Child?

Are You Looking After Someone Else's Child?

Who is Looking After You?

 

 

 

Feelings, Self-harm & Suicide Ideation

Feelings

Talking about feelings can be tricky. Emotions are often messy and difficult to deal with, especially when you’re young or feeling vulnerable. But they don’t need to be a stressful part of our lives and we learn to manage them well.

By developing our ability to be resilient, and sharing this knowledge with others, we can boost all our chances of living happier, healthier lives.

It’s time to break the silence surrounding mental illness, crush taboos and get young people in Lewisham feeling good about themselves and energised by life.

Kooth  is an online counselling and emotional well-being platform for children and young people aged 11+.  It  is accessible through mobile, tablet and desktop and free at the point of use.

Self-Harm & Suicide Ideation in Children & Young People

Mental health problems affect around one in 10 children and young people . This includes depression, anxiety, and conduct disorder, and are often a direct response to what is happening in their lives.

Self-harm is when someone hurts themselves on purpose and is a way of expressing deep distress, a way of communicating what cannot be put into words, with very difficult feelings that could build up inside. It is not attention seeking behaviour.

Self-Harm is a very common behaviour in young people and affects around one in 12 young people.  

Warning signs of Self-Harm

• People who self-harm may suffer mood swings and become withdrawn.
• Unexplained wounds.
• Have a lack of motivation.
• There may be changes in their eating habits.
• They may cover up their body (even in warm weather).

Warning signs of Suicide Ideation

They may be:

• Quiet, brooding, or withdrawn.
• Feeling exhausted and distant.
• Feeling cut off from those around them.
• Not making eye contact.
• Agitated, irritable or rude.
• Talking about suicide or saying it’s all hopeless.
• Desperate for help but afraid to ask.

They may also:

• Be busy, chirpy, laughing and joking, talking about future plans, and telling you not to worry about them.

The safest way to know if someone is thinking about suicide is to ask them. If a person is suicidal the idea is already there. If they aren’t suicidal it won’t do any harm. Saying something is safer than saying nothing.

Risk Factors of Self-Harm & Suicide Ideation

• Stressful life events.
• Isolation.
• Low self-esteem.
• On-going family relationship problems.
• Being bullied at school.
• Bereavement.
• Mental health problems – depression and delusional thoughts.
• Substance and alcohol misuse.
• Family circumstances.
• Stress and worry – academic pressure.
• Experience of abuse – physical, emotional, sexual abuse, sexual exploitation, and forced marriage.
• Feelings of being rejected in their lives.

 Types of Self-Harm

• Cutting of the skin with objects (e.g. razor blades, scissors, pens, bottle tops etc.)
• Scratching the skin.
• Picking wounds or interfering with healing.
• Burning.
• Ingesting toxic substances.
• Excessive drug or alcohol intake.
• Hitting or punching themselves.
• Head banging or biting themselves.
• Pulling hair out.
• Swallowing or inserting objects.
• Taking an overdose.
• Staying in an abusive relationship.
• Taking risks too easily.
• Restricting their eating.Young people can self-harm in a variety of body locations, i.e. arms, legs, abdomen, etc.

Responding to Self-Harm in Lewisham

If a child or young person overdoses or there is a serious self-harm incidence they should be taken to A&E in the first instance. An assessment will be undertaken which may involve a referral to the Children & Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS).

If you become aware of a young person who is self-harming or having suicidal thoughts. Explore their feelings with them and talk about the help available:-

Share what you know with the child’s parents / carers.

Resources

Coping with Self-Harm

Guide for anyone working with children and young people.

Calm Harm App.

Services

• Young Minds
  • Parents Helpline 0808 802 55 44
  • Advice for professionals
    
    
• GP – Make an appointment to talk about your concerns.  Your child may need some support from the Child & Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS)
• Kooth
  • Online chat support for young people
• Papyrus Hopeline 0800 068 41 41
  
  • Confidential advice for young people
  • Advice for parents / carers.
  • Advice for professionals
    
    
• ChildLine – 0800 11 11
  • Confidential advice for young people
  • Advice for professionals
    
    
• Place2Be
  • Individual one to one, drop in counselling for children and young people experiencing emotional wellbeing issues at 10 schools in Lewisham.
• National Self-Harm Network
• • UK charity offering moderated support forum for self-harm
• NHS Choices - Moodzone
• • Online and audio resources to improve mental wellbeing and information about available treatments

• MindEd
  • Online training for anyone working with 0-18 year olds

 

Sexual Exploitation

Sexual exploitation can be hard to recognise because you often believe you’re in a good relationship with the person, or people, who want to abuse your trust in them. It could be a friend, or a group of friends. It could be someone you think of as a boyfriend or girlfriend. It could be a person or a new group of people you’ve only just got to know. It could be someone you’ve talked to online. But whoever it is, they could use clever ways to take advantage of your relationship – and that means you can be harmed almost before you know what’s going on.

For example, someone might give you money, drugs, alcohol, gifts or somewhere to stay and then force you to do one or more of these things in return:

• have sex with them
• do something sexual to them
• be touched inappropriately, in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable
• look at sexual images – including films or pictures
• watch them do something sexual, including having sex or touching themselves sexually

That’s why it’s so important to look out for the warning signs in someone’s behaviour. So be aware, stay alert and keep safe.

What to do if you are worried about yourself or a friend

If you are worried about a situation that you or a friend is in, talk to an adult that you trust as soon as you can. You may also want to contact ChildLine on 0800 1111 or their website https://www.childline.org.uk/searchpage/?query.

If you, or a friend, are in immediate danger or want urgent help, call the police on 999.

Use our top tips to protect yourself from exploitation.

Three top tips to keep safe

1. Trust yourself to know when something is wrong.
2. If someone makes you feel unsafe, pressured or frightened, follow your instincts and seek help.
3. Don’t trust people you don’t know, even if they seem friendly – and make sure you know who you are talking to online. Never give away personal details or agree to meet someone who you have only talked to online. Don’t be tricked into doing things that are unsafe, even if they seem like fun. What might look exciting at first could be more dangerous than you realise.

Trafficking

People trafficking is the movement of people from one area to another by use of force or threat for the purpose of some form of exploitation.

Examples of exploitation could be forcing a young person to have sex, forcing them into marriage, forcing the young person to work in horrible conditions or forcing them to carry out a crime.

Traffickers can be male and female and control young people by threatening to report them to the authorities, telling them they owe large sums of money, or by threats of violence to them or their families.

Signs of Trafficking:

Could this be you or a friend?

• Do you go missing from home?
• Are you prevented from going outside or locked in?
• Are you not allowed to go to school or college?
• Are you forced to earn a certain amount of money each day?
• Do you have an excessive amount of chores to do at home?
• Do you have a bad relationship with your parents or carers?
• Are you told you have a large debt to pay back?
• Are you afraid of being sent away from the UK?

Where to get help?

If you recognise any of these signs then you need to get help by calling the telephone numbers below:

Police – 101 or 999 in an emergency

Child Line 0800 1111

NSPCC 24 hour Child Protection helpline 0808 800 5000

Worried about the safety of a child?

If you think a child is being abused or neglected please contact the Lewisham Multi Agency Safeguarding Hub (MASH). If you think a child or young person is at IMMEDIATE risk, you should treat this as an emergency and call 999 to report your concerns to the Police. You can contact the MASH during office hours on 020 8314 6660.  The out of office hours (5pm -9am weekdays, weekends and Bank Holidays) is: 020 8314 6000 and ask for the emergency duty team.

When you contact the MASH please give as much information as possible about the child you are concerned about. This will help MASH decide the best way to respond to your concern. The information you give will be kept confidential. You can remain anonymous but it is helpful if you can give your name and details.

MASH is the service to contact if you want extra help for a child or their family who live in Lewisham. The team is multi-agency and brings together services such as from social care, education, health, police and children centres. The MASH aims to work together to offer the right help at an early stage to families who need support.  They will decide the most appropriate type of support to offer. Depending on your relationship with the child they may be able to keep you updated.

Child Exploitation & On-line Protection

CEOP is there to support young people, parents and carers while surfing online, and offers help and advice on topics such as:

• cyberbullying
• hacking
• harmful content

It also enables people to immediately report anything online which they find concerning, such as harmful or inappropriate content, or possible grooming behaviour.

For more information or to report a concern click on the CEOP icon